Sunday, 27 February 2011

WORD FOR EVERY OCCASION -- CAPT AJIT VADAKAYIL


FUCK-


I remember, when i was a young boy of 11 years , my classmate called another guy, "a fucking Cu#t" , and he was literally in hot waters.

After a complaint by the aggrieved to the teacher, the matter went up to the principal.

90% of pupils in the class ( including "yours truly" ) did NOT even know the meaning of the word " fuck",

-- nor

HOW IT IS DONE --  OR WHAT IS THE AFTER EFFECT..

Our School was a prim and propah one. Finally the culprit got away, by apologising in front of his parents and the principal.

Today you find the word FUCK in most of the dictionaries and thesaurus's , except a few prudish UK English ones.

There is hardly a Hollywood movie or a TV English serial without using this universal word.

Let me list down a few " non -sexual" FUCK exclamations used at sea-- hardly anybody takes offence. It is just part of a good conversation.

It is a universal word to express greetings, resignation, confusion, despair, denial, apathy, anxiety, fraud, aggression, panic, disbelief, trouble, difficulty, pleasure, displeasure, loss, disgust, suspicion, ignorance, request, surprise, perplexity, a mere statement of fact, or whatever!


Holy fuck! You guys rock! 


What the fuck!
We had a good fuckin’ time ashore , right?
That was fucking amazing
Now that this new Chief Officer has come, we are all fucked
Who the fuck was that? 
Stop fucking around!
I fucking love this cabin!
I guess I'm really fucked now!
Fuck, that really hurt! 
Thats fuckin’ awesome, dude !
I don't understand anything about this fucking thing
What the fuck do you want
He fucks up everything, royally!
Holy fuck!  did you see that?
What's fucking wrong, you are sick ?
Why the fuck did you throw my old shoes away ?
That bitch at that bar corner looks  fuckin’ scary!
We have fucked food for dinner today!
Don’t fuck the system!
Fuck your rights!
My watch is fucked!
Fuck! I hit my head
Fucks sake , he pisses me off daily!
Fuck, we are gonna collide now!
Don’t fuck with me dude!
Holy fuckin’ shit, they are trying to kill us
That blonde canal inspector sitting in the CCR eminently fuckable
I don’t fuckin’ wanna know, OK?
I give a flying fuck!
Fuck!, I will be late again for my watch
How the fuck are you maan?
Captain fucked me today!
Fuck it maan, relax!
Fuck me? Fuck you too!
I don’t understand what is fucking goin’ on!
Fucked royally again, as usual !
I couldn’t  fucking be more happier!
What the fuck is goin’ on?
Where the fuck are we?
Un -fuckin’ -believable
Up your fuckin’ ass, dude!
I didn’t fucking do it , ok!
I know fuck about all this!
Its gonna explode, lets get the fuck outa here!
Fuck off!
You are late , its four- fuckin’ -thirty!
How did I wind up with this fucking job?
Fucked if I know !
What the fuck are your doin’? coming ashore?
He does fuck all around here!
Who the fuck are you?
How the fuck are you, dude?
Guess, its gonna be a fucked up day
Swaraj, is your fuckin’ birth right!
Boy, heads are fuckin’ gonna roll today!
Let the fuckin’ steward do the cleaning!
I do all the fuckin’ work around here!
You talk fucking too much!
AW! Fuck it man!
I don’t understand the fucking question
Hold on , while I shut up that noisy fuck  on VHF
What the fuck was all that crap about?
Get that little creepy fucker off my ship!
Fuck!  Fuuckk!!  Ffuuucckkk !!! ( Captain after colliding with 3 consecutive ships at Singapore anchorage )
Damn, the fuck got away!
You fuck-head, you let me down again!
Oprah -fuckin’- Winfrey is on TV!
The log shows just 80 fucking miles.
Fuck! cant stand his terrible stinking BO


Now let me end with a sexual joke! After all we must NOT forget the actual meaning.

a village bumpkin was told by his mother to sell their only duck as there was no bread in the house--

while he was going skippety skip to the fair-- he saw a fair girl giving him the glad eye--

she looked at this bulging crotch and said-- what a nice duck!

he stopped and said-- "if mE can fuck you, Ya can take this duck"

they fucked-- he gave her the duck-- the girl wanted an encore-- so she said

"if you fuck me once more, i'll give you , your duck back"

while he was fucking her again-- the duck wandered off and got run over by a truck-

seeing him despondant, she said —“ ok, i'll give you twenty dollars for the 2nd fuck"

the bumpkin goes home hoppety hop-- his mother sees him with the dead duck under his arm

she cried " what ever happened !!"?

the bumpkin says --let me put it this easy way--

A  FUCK  FOR  A  DUCK
A  DUCK  FOR  A  FUCK
NOW  I  HAVE  TWENNY  BUCKS
AND  A  FUCKED  UP  DUCK








CAPT AJIT VADAKAYIL
..






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